RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE BLOG

ITS THE YEAR 2011...

AND JAMES FRANCO HAS GONE FROM
OUR FAVORITE COMEDIC POT DEALER

TO...

A GENETIC SCIENTIST?

Thats right. I am back party people.

And the first thing I would like to write about today is...

(WARNING: If you have not seen RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES, DO NOT READ THIS BLOG. Or if you frankly don't give a shit about spoilers go ahead.
But hey... I warned ya)

The beginning of the movie starts off with James Franco's character works as a genetic scientist at this evil pharmaceutical place, GynSys, who of course, loves to test their shit out on chimpanzees.

James Franco, does all this monkey stabbing, in order to find a cure for Alzheimer disease,
for his dear old dad. Who of course is played by a fellow ape lover, John Lithgow.

After seeing Lithgow get naked in Dexter

My ideals of Lithgow have been shattered.

So many wrinkles... so little blankets to shield my eyes.

Anywho back to the story.

After something goes horribly array with a tester chimp named "Bright Eyes".
(Side note: Bright Eyes was the name Charlton Heston's character was referred to as,
in the original PLANET OF THE APES films)

Franco is left to play parent to a baby chimp he names Caesar.

Now being that Caesar was born from a mom who was being pumped filled with crazy smart ape gas, Caesar got the brain genes as well.

Time went on, Ceaser got smarter. Too smart if you ask me.

HOLD ON.
I would just like to point out that chimpanzees are assholes.

I was watching Oprah once, and she was talking about this little guy down below.

Ya cute right?
Wrong. This asshole, is a mauler.

Charla Nash, went on The Oprah Show to tell her tale.
Her tale that is the stuff of nightmares.

Her friends "pet" chimpanzee, went ape shit (no pun intended)

and ripped off her hands, nose, eyes and lips.

BOOM! Proof, chimpanzees are assholes.

We feed you bananas and other vegetation, put you in cute clothing,

and even give you a cigarette or two. How do you repay us?

By horribly disfiguring a woman? Ya thanks chimps.

Okay Yes. Back to the story.

At some point in the film, Caesar goes nuts when trying to protect crazy old Lithgow

And is forced into an Ape Shelter, where he is missed treated.

And loses his damn marbles.

Caesar breaks out of the joint, goes back to the lab... proceeds to "do work"

He grabs the crazy brain juice, and starts letting it out around his ape compadres back at the shelter. Caesar then becomes the leader of an Ape Revolution.

There was a huge bridge scene, apes versus people. Pure pandemonium.

Highlight of the bridge scene for me, was the silver back gorilla, who took it upon himself to destroy a helicopter that was shooting , in order to protect the rest of apes.
Talk about commitment.

Being the hero of the story, of course Caesar survives the shootout. And James Franco, is virtually crying obnoxiously while looking for his monkey. He ends up finding Caesar and the rest of his crew, in a forest area, right across from the bridge.

INSTEAD OF TELLING CEASAR TO QUIT THE SHIT...

Ceasar creepily whispers sweet nothings to James Franco.

They hug it out. And James Franco wishes his furry buddy a good luck on total domination of the human race, damning us to be slaves, who later get put in the not so great Tim Burton remake.

THANKS JAMES FRANCO.

There is a place for you in monkey heaven, and human hell now.

In other news...

WALKING DEAD SEASON 2

PREMIERES OCT.16TH AT 9PM ON AMC

This year at Seattle's Emerald City Comic Con
I got to meet one of the stars of WALKING DEAD, and half of the duo of
The Boondock Saints
Norman Reedus

Outside of smelling like pure whiskey, he was a sweet man!

News of WALKING DEAD's creator, co producer, and director Frank Darabont stepping down from the multi million dollar project hit the internet earlier last month.

Darabont was supposedly "a pain in the ass to work with".

AMC also decided to cut the budget for the show. The first season of WALKING DEAD had a budget of $3.4 million dollars for a total of six episodes, as to where season 2 had a budget of $2.7 million dollars for a total of 13 episodes, which is the standard episode amount of most AMC dramas. Darabont said he felt that AMC was trying to "tell him how to produce" his own show too much, and stepped down.

Darabont was apparently all smiles at the 2011 San Diego International Comic Con

And was removed from the series a week later.

Outside of the creator chaos, I am still hopeful that season 2 will be great.

Robert Kirkman ( Creator of THE WALKING DEAD comic series), said in an interview with screenrant.com, that we will be seeing Hershel's farm this season, which had a small role in the comic, but huge impact on the rest of the series.

To see the trailer for WALKING DEAD SEASON 2

(Click this link here)

We're almost to the finish line people.

But I have one more rant...

WTF?! IS WITH THIS PLANKING CRAZE

According to urban dictionary, this is the definition of planking:

PLANKING - The art of planking is to lay horizontally across any object or the ground with their arms by their sides, aiming to occur in daring situations or a brotherly display of core-strength..

If I see one more facebook, twitter or email chain about planking I may shoot whatever technology is near me.

Really people? Instead of finding cures for diseases, solving the economy woes, or figuring out why Christopher Walken will take any role, even if its completely beneath him, we decide to "PLANK" all over the place.

At least planking is benefiting Hugh Hefner.

And if something benefits Hugh Hefner... it benefits America.

Hope you enjoyed reading.

Stay classy interwebs.

- Carmen